


Transgression

by neosaiyanangel



Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: F/F, Forgiveness, Guilt, Talking
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-18
Updated: 2019-09-18
Packaged: 2020-10-21 00:10:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20684255
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/neosaiyanangel/pseuds/neosaiyanangel
Summary: Some things shouldn’t be forgiven. Betrayal, wonton violence, punishing the innocent. Things that show a pure lack of morals. Things that Bismuth is guilty of. The worst one she can think of is the fate she left for the poor Lapis Lazuli that had crossed her path. The Lapis Lazuli that now fights by her side.Fate and karma are pure, unadulterated jerkoffs.





	Transgression

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Somecallmemichelle](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Somecallmemichelle/gifts).

It was hot. Very hot. Hot as lava, in fact.

All around her, lava flowed and ebbed. It was her sanctuary. Her home.

The beach house? Fine enough. It was where all her friends lived. It was a good place.

But _this_—the workbench, the glowing lava, the weapons and armor, bits and pieces of machines and contraptions she was in the middle of crafting—was her home. It was all her. She _belonged_ here. Her gem shimmered in the brilliance of the magma, the ever-shifting heat.

Bismuth took in a breath and let it out, savoring the smell of heat and burning rocks. It was wonderful, to be out again. To be able to craft what _she_ wanted, even beyond the weapons for the Crystal Gems.

There was an idea in her head that simply wouldn't go away. Something basic, something that called back to her days as a worker in the Diamond Authority. It was a little strange. She'd sworn she would never do anything like that again, yet here she was.

She had her home. Garnet, Amethyst, Pearl, and Steven had their home. But the other Crystal Gems in their core group, Lapis and Peridot...their home was destroyed, used as a weapon in the fight against Yellow and Blue Diamond. They were bumming at the beach house. But it wasn't their home.

Bismuth could fix that. Give them a home. Maybe that would finally put another beautiful smile on Lapis' face.

She shook off that thought. No, she couldn't let herself go down that path. Lapis wouldn't. Not after what Bismuth did to her during the war.

She drowned the thought in work. Crafting a full barn from iron wouldn't be an easy or quick process. If she was going to finish it any time this century, she had to get started now.

* * *

"Bismuth?"

The rainbow gem jumped at the same time her gem shivered, nearly dropping the piece of iron she was shaping into a support beam. She turned around, still holding the hot piece of iron in her grip, to confirm the owner of the familiar voice. As she expected, it was the precious Lapis Lazuli that had helped fight White Diamond on Homeworld.

"Uh, hi?" Bismuth put on a crooked grin. "What brings you to my little corner of Earth? Miss me?"

"I, ah…" Lapis rubbed her arm, looking away. "I need to talk with you."

"Oh? You have 'bismuth' with me?" Bismuth let out a hearty laugh.

The blue gem gave a half-hearted chuckle. "Yeah."

Lapis looked uncomfortable, stealing a few glances at the lava flowing around them. Realization flooded Bismuth as to why. Water gem! Duh!

"Here. Let's go somewhere a lil' more comfy for you." Bismuth marched on out of her cozy home out into the path that led to the warp pad. She didn't even bother looking to see if Lapis was following her. Of _course_ she was!

Bismuth stopped at the little hot spring-like crater, the water shifting and bubbling from the heat. Lapis shot her a grateful look before she summoned her wings and hopped over the lip before settling down on top of it. Her feet splashed into the water.

Bismuth settled for leaning against the crater, face even with Lapis' shoulders. "So, what can I do ya for?"

Lapis again looked uncomfortable. Her gaze shifted to stare into the boiling pool. "It's about...the war."

Bismuth's gem felt like it froze over. She couldn't help the strange look on her face as she said, "The war? Way back when?"

Lapis nodded. "Yeah." She looked at Bismuth out of the corner of her eye. A huge sigh was followed by, "I know it was you." This time Bismuth felt herself stop completely. Those words panged deep into her gem. Seeming to think it needed clarifying, Lapis continued, "You were the gem that disrupted me during the war. That left me to be confused by Homeworld as a Crystal Gem."

Bismuth winced. She knew how badly Lapis' life had gone after the war came. The loneliness. Isolation. Bits of torture scattered about.

And it had been Bismuth's fault.

"I—" She cut herself off as she looked away. Trying to defend herself, she babbled, "I mean, it was war! You were an elite! Who _else's_ side would you have been on? And...and…"

Lapis looked down at her. Pointless. Her defensive argument was pointless before the gem she had harmed. There was silent judgment in the eyes and the stare of the blue gem. And, for some reason, disappointment.

Bismuth deflated. What could she say? What in the world could make this better?

She said the only thing that conveyed any sense of her feelings.

"I'm sorry."

The look on Lapis' face didn't shift. The same contemplative, judgmental stare, now joined by the tapping of a finger on the lip of the crater. The look drove daggers into Bismuth's gem. It was awful, that expression directed at her.

"I—I just—I'm just so sorry!" Bismuth pleaded, "I was just trying to do my duty as a Crystal Gem. You were collateral damage. I misjudged you. Stereotyped you. I…" She lamely repeated, "I'm sorry. If I'd known…"

She closed her eyes and rested her head against the side of the crater. The heat from the boiling water on the other side of the crater made her feel just a little more at ease, enough that she wasn't full-on begging.

It felt like a string of screw-ups on her part. Wrecking Lapis' life, the Breaking Point, attacking both Rose _and_ Steven...her desire for revenge against the elites left twisted remains of relationships in her wake. When has she lost sight of her goal? When had it transformed into something completely unrecognizable from its origins? She'd wanted to free gems like herself: the Peridots, the Crazy Lace, the Rhodolite. The so-called lesser gems made to serve. Instead, she'd ended up attacking and hurting the innocent. Those just trying to help. Her friends.

"I forgive you."

Bismuth jumped at the words. She dared to look back up at Lapis.

The blue gem was still giving her a judging look, some of her emotions hidden behind her normal poker face. But there was a small glimmer in her eyes now, one that put Bismuth at ease.

"The war messed up a lot of things. A lot of _gems_," Lapis began explaining, eyes drilling into Bismuth's own. "Nothing went right for any of us. You did what you thought was the best thing to do at the time. You couldn't have known what would happen to me." She settled a hand on Bismuth's shoulder. "I think if you had, you would've spared me. Or," a crooked grin crossed Lapis' face, "possibly conscripted me."

Bismuth finally relaxed at the small bit of teasing. "I dunno…after all!" She suddenly snatched Lapis from the crater and pulled her into a headlock. As Lapis squawked in surprise, Bismuth gave her a nuggie while saying with a grin, "You _are_ one of the upper crust. I'm sure you would've been a cream puff. Enough of one that you wouldn't pass basic."

Lapis gave her own laugh, one that made tingles if joy spread throughout Bismuth's gem. She struggled a little before pulling her head free. "Oh please. I took on _Jasper_ and came through the other end. I could've handled it."

"Pfffft." Bismuth waved a hand in the air. "You wish!"

"I could take you right now," Lapis daringly said, eyebrow quirked in challenge.

"Oh?" Bismuth took a few steps back and struck a defensive pose. "Show me what you've got, Cream Puff!"

"Gladly." Lapis suddenly floated into the air, wings materializing behind her. Water flowed from the crater to swirl around her in cylindrical orbits. A determined stare paired with a quirky little grin set Bismuth's gem ablaze.

As the two began charging each other, Bismuth couldn't help the mental sigh of relief.

Lapis didn't hate her. In fact...she might actually have a shot. Nothing like Ruby and Sapphire. But...maybe…something might be there, what with the teasing.

Her mind immediately focused back to the oncoming fight as Lapis shot out water tentacles, clearly aiming to snag Bismuth.

Bismuth chuckled to herself at the basic move. Child's play.

Time to show Lapis what being in the big leagues was all about.


End file.
